Trampoline Fitness Will Be The End Of Us All

Does anybody understand there’s so much more to exercise than “calories burned”???

The ‘brains’ behind Trampoline fitness suggest such benefits <ahem> to their “low contact, high intensity workouts” as:

“…burn up to 1,000 calories an hour” and “many of the same toning and cardio effects as jogging, but without the jarring impact on the joints”

So what happens when you step back on terra firma where each and every step you take (whether walking, jogging, running or skipping) puts the “jarring impact” of 3 to 12 times your own bodyweight on your joints. I dunno about you, but I’d rather stick with good ol’ fashioned hard work and the full force of gravity to make my muscles the strongest, most reactive, energy-chomping machines they can be.

And I have no idea how anyone can call an hour of non-stop bouncing a “high intensity workout” while keeping a straight face. A non-stop hour of ANYTHING may make you sweat like a mountain goat in heat (or something to that effect), but it doesn’t make it intense. Although it may be considered challenging, by definition, anything short of a full-out sprint/max effort lift becomes LESS intense the longer you continually perform that activity.

No wonder America is getting fatter by the day. Seems a growing percentage of the population goes out of their way to avoid the exact kind of stress they really need – and these trampolidiots enable that kind of thinking.

Yeah, jumping around may be fun, but if we can’t make a cultural return to real strength training as the basis of “fitness”, it won’t be long until we implode under the weight of our collective gravitational pull.