I Like You, But You’re Crazy.

I needed to make room in my garage for a snow-blower so after many years of faithful service, I listed my big ol’ training tire (which I fondly knew as “Exhibit A”) on craigslist this morning as a “free, but YOU need to haul it away” deal. Several people responded within the first 90 mins.

Tonight, the first-to-call (a guy in his early 20s, if I had to guess) came over to pick it up with a li’l 2-door Toyota hatchback thinking it’d fit in the back if he simply flipped the seats down. Once he realized that wouldn’t happen, he suggested putting it on the roof of the car. I did my best to talk him out of it and recommended he find a friend with a pickup truck – but he insisted that he’d be comfortable driving 2 miles to his home on side streets with a giant tire on the roof. Being the kind of guy who lifts heavy things for fun, I was more than happy to help him maneuver the tire atop his sports car.

I then asked him if he had any tie-down straps so he could secure the load. He pulled a bunji cord from under the front seat and attempted to ‘secure’ the tire to his car (it might as well have been dental floss). I grabbed a ratcheting tie-down strap from the garage so, at the very least, the tire would look secure if he gets pulled over.

Throughout this whole ordeal, I kept imagining this as an interesting remake of the scene from Old School where Frank (Will Ferrell) accidentally shoots himself in the jugular vein with “the most powerful tranq-gun on the market”.

Peppers (Seann Williams Scott) tells Frank, “You got a f’kin dart in your neck, man.

Frank looks at him and replies, “You’re… you’re crazy, man. I like you, but you’re crazy.”

Craigslist guy, you got a f’kin tire ON THE ROOF OF YOUR CAR.. and you ARE crazy, but I like you.

Now I can only hope you enjoy training with Exhibit A as much as I did.

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